A while back, Bryson heard my mom say, "uh oh spaghetti-o!" and few days later he was racking his brain trying to say what Mimi had said, but instead said, "uh oh spagheti noodles." It was the cutest thing!
Flashback to early morning on July 4th, we were all thrilled to see this:
Bryson had NO clue why he was holding this plastic stick, but he was thrilled because he could tell we were so excited :) We couldn't tell him what it meant yet because he is a HUGE talker and would spill the beans within hours. So Michael and I kept it as a fun special secret for the next several weeks. We were ready to add to our family, so we were excited it happened so quickly!
The next day, we went down to the lake for our Fun Fourth Family weekend and had to keep it a secret from everyone.
We had planned on keeping it a secret well past the first trimester, just for the fact that Jen was pregnant too, and as much as we've always wanted to be pregnant together, I also wanted her to have "her time" being pregnant.
I went to the first Dr appointment on July 8th after we got back from the lake and they took a blood sample and talked about the "official"stuff and gave me a due date of March 9th. :) All was well and we continued on our merry little life.
We went to Possum Kingdom Lake with Michael's side of the family in late July and had to continue the secret. Pregnancy brain already kicked in because I totally forgot my camera.
We had our actual dr visit and sonogram when I was 7 and a half weeks, on July 26. We were SO excited to go make sure everything was OK and see the litle heart beat. I told mom I had a dentist appointment, so she was watching Bryson for the morning.
My doctor came in, we talked a little and then he started the sonogram. Michael made small talk as I anxiously awaited to see the heart beat. We finally got a good view of the babe and I breathed a huge sigh of relief as I giggled about how it looked like a seahorse :)
My doctor is usually very chatty, and after a minute or so after we saw the baby, his demeanor totally changed. He got quite, still and had a quizzical look on his face. Immediately, I began to panic. I felt like my heart stopped as I glanced at Michael and then back at my doctor. I asked him what happened and if something was wrong. It took him a second to find an answer. Then, he said, "well, no, everyhing is fine, but look down here...there's another one!"
I waited for him to laugh as if he was playing a joke on us....twins!? SURELY he was kidding!
Then I realized he was serious and my heart stopped again. Michael almost fell flat out of the chair on the ground and all I could say is, "no! no way! you're kidding right? what?! no way!"
He continued talking but for the life of me, I can't remember a single word he uttered. My body was frozen on the table and all I could think about was TWO BABIES.
After a while, he left the room and as soon as the door closed, I lost it. I couldn't control my tears as I hugged Michael. Two babies was not in our plan. We were ready for one. Prepared emotionally and finacially for one. But two!? It's not that I was upset by anymeans, I just had an overwhelming waterfall of emotions that I wasn't ready for. Our life was changing more than we thought or planned.
After a few minutes, I looked at Michael through red puffy eyes and realized that we had been so diligent in planning for our family and our future and told him that God has basically just said 'Stop planning this life. It's not yours, it's Mine and I know what you need.' And I completely believe that.
Then more emotions came. How can my body carry two babies? How can I grow them big enough to be ready to face the world in a few short months? Then guilt. Guilt for being sick for the previous weeks and not being able to eat enough calories for me, let alone two babies. How will they grow if I'm just eating saltine crackers and water?? All I could do was pray.
Before we left the parking lot, Michael hugged me tight and I cried more. He had the most perfect words to calm my heart. I squeezed him again and then he drove off to work. I prayed and cried and prayed and cried the whole way down to my parent's house to pick up B. I drove past Chick-Fil-A and forced myself to stop and get and a breakfast meal just to get calories in me. I hated so much that I hadn't been able to eat. And of course, this time was no different. I took a few sips of my orange juice and I was done eating. I sat in the parking lot trying to think about the future of our family. I cried and prayed so much, I can't even tell you.
Amazingly enough, Michael and I had already planned a date weekend at a bed and breakfast for the following day. It was the most perfect timing and the most perfect time for us to try to digest what was happening. We prayed a lot together. We prayed that God would hold them tight and grow them big and strong. We prayed that it would be a good pregnancy. We prayed for Bryson adjusting to be a big brother. We prayed.
I didn't know a single thing about twin pregnancy or birth, so I researched it a lot over the weekend. Then, I scared myself silly with too much research. There is some seriously scary stuff out there.
Fast forward to early August. We decided that we couldn't wait until after the 1st trimester anymore. For one, who cn keep TWINS a secret for 3 o 4 more weeks!? An two, I was tol by everyone that I would be showing quite noticeably by 8 weeks, so our window was closing in without them noticing first. We told Bryson about the two babies in mommy's tummy and he was thrilled!! It was so funny, but he immediately said he is going to have sisters :) We recorded us telling him; I'll post the video soon, as well as telling our families.....
But for now...Uh Oh Spaghetti Sauce!!! There are TWO babies!!